Cause I’m in a field of dandelions
Wishing on every one that you’ll be mine, mine
And I see forever in your eyes
I feel okay when I see you smile, smile
Wishing on dandelions all of the time
Praying to God that one day you’ll be mine*
This afternoon is very stunning owing to the golden sunset is shining all around me. The wide field of dandelions looks so chic adorning my sight. A man over there picking the dandelion is my grandfather. He knows how amazed I am in dandelion.
“Dinda! How many dandelions do you need?” he shouts from a distance and raises the fistful of dandelions in his hand up.
“I think that is enough, grandpa. You can come back now” I utter loudly. With that, he approaches me and carries a bunch of dandelions. I am ecstatically blithe, then I blow that dandelion. When It flies, my heart feels blooming.
“Do you know, Dinda? I remember to your grandma when I look you like this” he enunciates softly, but his words make it difficult for me to understand.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Your grandma really loved to dandelion as well. When she was alive still, she always came here only to enjoy this dandelions field” he says as brings back his picturesque past moment with his wife, my grandma.
“How big love do you have to her?” I inquire him.
“Very big. The universe will probably lose if there is a tool to weigh how big I love her.” His wrinkled skin seems carving his gaiety when he smiles. He is truly proud when he can tell about my grandma’s story. He successes keeping his reminiscence to stay alive with his body and soul.
“Do I have many similar things to my grandma?” I question him.
“Yeah, when you were born, I look her reflection in you” he declares bravely.
“How do you say like that? You make more perplexed and I need more story about my grandma,” I state.
“Ok. I will tell you a simple story about your grandma. This story is begun with many years ago.”
***
Many years ago…
At that juncture, your grandma was the most desirable lady in this village. She was a belle. Everyone loved her, including me. We always competed each other to get your grandma’s heart. One thing that I remember most is she was genuinely apt to dandelion. She might be here for everyday. One day, she was only here in alone. Then I approached her and I expressed all of my feeling. She only smiled then nodded as the purport she received me to be hers. I was very really happy.
Time by time, we got closer and our relation got stronger. I decided to marry her. Even after we already married, she always came here and I accompanied her.
“Why do you like to dandelion, Liana?” I enquire.
“I like dandelion because it is so beautiful. And you know what? There are many philosophies on this flower. It symbolizes courage and confidence. Imagine! When it is blown by wind, it will fly in loneliness to the several places. Then, the bits of the flower that fly will fall and grow again to create its new life.”
She really knew about dandelions so much. She was a smart woman. When she was pregnant with your mother, she took great care of herself. She did not eat or drink recklessly. But, something that we did not hope coming out of the blue to her. After your mother was born, your grandma was diagnosed that she had a cancer. She felt forlorn, so did I.
Thereafter, I did not look her bliss anymore. She always daydreamed and cried. She were in suffering. I tried to comfort her, but it was vain. In the end, she turned to God. She passed away when your mother was still three years old. I was so broken with her gone. She was my only love one. Our stories were ended, full of sad.
Subsequently, I only lived with your mother. We both everyday visited your grandma’s grave and her favorite place, dandelions field. I tried to make our days became better.
As your grandma ever said that dandelion will fly and grow again to create its new life made me convinced that your grandma also would be born again in the next time. When your mother was being adult, she married then conceived you. And when you were born, I looked your grandma’s spirit on your body. So that, I believe that you are the reincarnation of your grandma.
***
“That is the story about your grandma,” He smiles and looks my eyes solemnly. “Dinda, listen to me! I am very sure that you are another shape of your grandma. You both have many similar things. So, I will love you as I love your grandma.”
Then, an ephemeral loneliness undesignedly occurs between us, and making the moment awkward. Some ravens seem flying through the golden sky and become silhouette on there. The dandelions blown by wind look like to wave saying goodbye and see you for tomorrow.
Lenteng, December 31st 2022.
*Song title, Dandelions – Ruth B.
Illustration source: https://id.pinterest.com/pin/244953667211603182/